Dialogue with a man may vary depending on the type of relationship, culture, age, or personal communication style. With that said, in order to communicate effectively with a man, make sure you find the right time to speak. When arguing about a problem, avoid using phrases that start with "you" unless you want to make positive comments. To avoid communication problems, do not assume that he is not listening and avoid being guided by stereotypes. Also, for effective communication, tailor text messages to each particular situation.
Method 1 of 3: Encourage open communication
Step 1. Identify appropriate behavior for the relationship
Communication with a man can vary depending on the type of relationship they have, so it is important to adapt the interactions to the type of relational bond.
- Is the man in question your romantic partner? Communication can be more intimate by encouraging him to open up with you, as well as providing emotional support when he needs it. Try to listen and support him.
- Is the man in question your boss or coworker? Try to keep a little distance and maintain respect in communication. Be polite and have short conversations about their lives. Avoid controversial or overly personal topics.
- Is the man in question a relative? In this case, you can open up a little more, although you have the possibility to choose if you want to talk about your personal matters or not.
- Take into account the cultural aspects. Men of different cultures interact with people in different ways.
Step 2. Find a good time to talk
Avoid talking about it when both of you are distracted or in a rush, and wait until you have some free time to talk. If the two of you are very busy, schedule a time to talk.
For example, you might ask, "Hey Jon, I'd like to talk to you. When do you think is a good time to talk?"
Step 3. Start the conversation with a positive phrase
This is especially important if you need to discuss a problem. Before delving into the subject, be sure to compliment him or make an encouraging comment, as well as use a positive tone. If you use a negative or accusatory tone of voice, they may feel attacked and not want to hear what you have to say.
- For example, you can say, “You are such an understanding person, Kevin. You have always been there when I have needed to talk to someone or solve a problem”.
- You can also say "I like working with you because you always have a positive perspective when it comes to resolving conflicts."
Step 4. Use the phrases “I”, instead of the phrases “you”
Phrases that start with "you" sound accusatory. He may become defensive if you start with a "you" phrase or use these types of statements throughout the conversation. Instead, start on neutral ground by using the phrases "I" or "we."
- For example, instead of saying, "You never listen to me," try saying, "I think our communication problems are because we always interrupt each other when we talk."
- You can use the phrases "you" to congratulate him or make a positive comment. For example, you can say, "You did an excellent job delivering the speech, Darrel. There were so many interesting questions regarding your presentation!"
Step 5. Listen to what they have to say
When you finish speaking, give him the floor. Put your cell phone and other distractions aside. Sit facing each other to show that you are giving them your full attention. Wait for him to finish talking to make a comment.
Step 6. Be honest with each other
Whether it's your coworker, friend, partner, or family member, honesty is the best way to communicate with someone. Express what you feel and encourage him to do the same. If you made a mistake, apologize. This will also help you open up to talk about your mistakes.
- For example, you can say, "I'm sorry you didn't take me seriously when I told you that I needed to pick up the package today. This is something very important to me, for which I apologize if I was not clear from the start."
- Some men from certain cultures or who have a special type of communication may feel uncomfortable when it comes to being open and direct with someone they do not know well.
Method 2 of 3: Avoid Misunderstandings During Communication
Step 1. Nod your head only if you agree with him
Some people tend to nod their heads to indicate that they are listening. However, the other person could interpret that you agree, even if you don't. Therefore, keep your body language in mind. If you notice that you are nodding and disagreeing, correct your body language.
For example, instead of nodding your head, you can say "I understand what you are saying" or "Okay, what you are saying makes sense but my opinion is different."
Step 2. Avoid assuming that they have not heard what you have said
Don't mistake neutral body language for boredom or inattention. Possibly, he is just processing the information. When you're done talking, ask for his opinion on it.
For example, instead of asking "Are you even listening to me?" or "Did you hear me?", you can say "Do you understand what I'm saying? Let me know if you need clarification."
Step 3. Just talk about the particular topic
During the conversation, you may remember something else that you want to talk about. However, for the benefit of the current conversation, avoid bringing it up and try to discuss it at another time. If you bring up a new topic, it may become distracting or distracting.
Remember that you must come up with some kind of solution or conclusion at the end of the conversation in order to move on
Step 4. Be aware of stereotypes in communication
Try to overcome stereotypes for the benefit of communication. The moment you notice that you are assuming he doesn't listen to you or doesn't care what you say based on his body language or tone of voice, take a step back and reassess the situation. This may be your own way of communicating. If you wish, you can ask him something that you have not clearly understood.
- For example, you can say, "I'm not sure I understood you. Could you explain it to me in other words?"
- Don't assume he won't understand you just because he's a man.
Step 5. Tailor tactics to the man's communication style
Some men are very talkative and outgoing. Others may be more quiet and introverted. Make sure you adapt to their communication style.
- If the man is very quiet or terse, ask more open questions so that he can open up.
- If the man is very talkative, be sure to listen to him without interrupting him. Make interesting comments about their stories.
- Some men have an easier time communicating in quiet and private spaces, while others prefer public and crowded places.
Method 3 of 3: Communicate Effectively Through Text Messages
Step 1. Tell him that you will write to him later, if he is too busy
If you want to talk to him but are concerned that he is doing something else, let him know that you are okay with writing to him later. You can say "Hey Greg, I just wanted to catch up. Write or call me when you have some free time" or "Text me when you're not busy."
In this way, you will give him the possibility to speak when he has time
Step 2. Send him a suggestive message to get his attention
If you've been texting your crush and he's being indifferent, you can write to him, "I can't wait to meet for a movie on Friday," or, "You were so cute the other night, Patrick." Positive feedback will encourage him to reply to you.
Once you start the conversation, invite him to play, for example, truth or consequence to keep the dialogue going
Step 3. Speak personally if the topic is serious
Communications through text messages can lead to misunderstandings. If you need to talk about an important topic, talk it over personally to avoid communication problems.