College is exciting and scary at the same time. You will have a lot of freedom, but you will also be in a new environment surrounded by many totally unknown people. It will take a conscious effort to make new friends, but you can definitely do it. Take a deep breath and get out of your comfort zone. After all, you won't be able to make friends by sitting in your room. Start a conversation with your classmates, ask people out, and get involved on campus. You must keep an open mind and be true to yourself at all times.
Steps
Method 1 of 4: Take the Initiative
Step 1. Go to class early and start a conversation
If you arrive to class 10 minutes before it starts, you will have time to settle in and talk with your classmates. You may be afraid to talk to strangers, but it will be worth it to feel a little uncomfortable if you can make friends this way. Make comments about homework, something that is happening in college, or a very eccentric professor.
- Say something like, "What did you think of reading from last class?" or “I heard that this teacher loves to surprise students to participate. I'm a little bit nervous!".
- You should introduce yourself whenever you sit next to a stranger in class.
Step 2. Ask them out
You should not wait for others to approach you. Take the initiative and invite the students of your class or university residence to lunch, get ready for a party or go to the gym. Don't worry, if you ask others out, this won't make you look weird or desperate for friends. You will have to go out into the world to develop contacts and other people will likely appreciate your effort.
- If you do daily activities together (like eating, studying, or exercising), this will be a great way to fit socialization into your busy schedule.
- If you don't like parties, invite others to your dorm for a late night movie or party.
Step 3. Try to converse with a new person every day
You can start a conversation anywhere. Talk to the girl next to you in the elevator or the guy who takes his clothes out of the dryer next to yours. The more people you meet, the more likely you are to find some great friends.
Step 4. Keep your bedroom door open
In college dorms, leaving your bedroom door open while you're hanging out will give your classmates a chance to greet you. Wave and smile at people who pass by. You could even offer them snacks; no college student will turn down free food.
Only leave the door open if you are in the room. Close it when you go out to avoid being robbed
Method 2 of 4: Leave your room
Step 1. Go to events on campus
You won't be able to make friends if you stay in your room all day. Get dressed, take a deep breath, and go to a soccer game, dance, party, or festival on campus. You could find many potential friends at these events. Also, if you keep up to date with them, you will have more topics of conversation with your colleagues.
Step 2. Do your homework in social spaces
Of course, you may have to stay in the library during exam periods, but try to do your homework in the student center or cafeteria on other less stressful occasions. Sit next to a friendly looking student and start a conversation.
You could ask for a coffee recommendation or a pencil. Say something like, “Hi, I've never eaten here and I don't know what to order. What drink do you usually consume?
Step 3. Accept the invitations
If someone invites you for coffee, lunch or a party; you must accept. Do not do anything that violates your values, but it will be important that you get out of your comfort zone in order to meet other people.
- If you're not into parties very much, don't feel pressured to attend a lot of frat parties or drink. You can bond with people in other ways.
- Try to give everyone a chance. Avoid judging people. While you should never do anything that you are not comfortable with, you might be surprised who ends up being your friend!
Step 4. Eat your dinner in the same dining room every night
Go to the dining room, instead of eating it at the desk in your bedroom. Make an effort to get to know the other students who frequent the lunchroom. Feel free to sit next to a stranger or start a conversation at the dessert bar.
- Introduce yourself by saying something like “Hi, I'm Jack. I seem to have seen you around here a couple of times. I live in the bedroom next to the dining room”.
- Make a comment about the food. If the burgers look a little weird, look at the person next to you and say something like, “How do you like these burgers? Should I eat one or would it be better not to? "
- If you don't follow a meal plan, invite your dining companions to cook together or host a potluck.
Method 3 of 4: Join Activities and Groups
Step 1. Join a club
Ask about your options with the corresponding office or the university website. You are likely to find academic, pre-professional, cultural, performing arts, and volunteer clubs. Join one that sounds great to you and get ready to meet lots of people with common interests.
- If the university doesn't have a club that interests you, be bold and create your own! You could create a club related to your favorite type of art or a unique academic interest.
- Don't take on more responsibilities than you can handle. If you have just entered, it will be vital that you take some time to adjust to university life. You can join one club, but three could overwhelm you to a great extent and very quickly.
Step 2. Join a sports team
You can join an internal team, both of which are very casual. These are a great option if you want to try a new sport. You can have a more intense experience by joining a competitive team from a club on campus. Competing, sweating, and perhaps even winning together will be the most effective way to develop new friendships.
If you don't want to join a team, you can participate in spontaneous games a couple of times a week or attend a frequent class in the gym
Step 3. Volunteer
If there is a cause you care about, find out if there are volunteer opportunities available. The university may have some volunteer organizations, or it may help you find opportunities in your area. Volunteering will be a great way to get out of your bubble in college, give back to the community, and meet like-minded people.
Look for volunteer opportunities off campus. If you can't find anything you like, you can organize your own project
Step 4. Get a job that requires you to socialize very often
You can work as a tutor for your colleagues, waiter or salesman. Not only will this help you earn a little money to cover college expenses, but it will also allow you to bond with your coworkers and maybe even some clients!
You will be able to meet many students through campus jobs. However, if you want to meet totally unknown people, you can get a job outside of it
Step 5. Join a fraternity or sorority
These aren't right for everyone, but they can provide a great sense of community. You can go to one if this type of community interests you. Keep in mind that if you don't like it, you can leave it.
Step 6. Create a study group
Email the students in your dorm or gather a few people from your class. If you study difficult material together (and perhaps with 1 or 2 teachers), this will be a quick way to bond. Plus, your grades could improve!
Step 7. Work as a supervisor of a university residence
You could have this opportunity if you are studying the last years in the university. These individuals provide academic, social, and personal assistance to members of your college residence. This job will give you the opportunity to connect with other supervisors and the students under your responsibility.
Step 8. Participate in a religious community
Religion may have been an important part of your life before entering college. Joining a religious community can help you maintain a close relationship with your faith while also meeting people who share your faith. If your campus doesn't have the community you're looking for, find out if there's one available outside of it.
Method 4 of 4: Attract the Right People
Step 1. Look friendly
If you're feeling uncomfortable or nervous, you may be tempted to subconsciously start checking your social media to make yourself look busy. However, this will not invite people to approach you. Instead, put your phone away and use confident, relaxed body language, such as smiling, standing up straight, and making eye contact with others. In this way, you will appear friendly and receptive.
- Don't cross your arms or look at the floor.
- Avoid spending too much time on social media. While it's important to keep in touch with old friends, it's also a good thing to meet new people.
- Fake it until you make it. Even if this makes you uncomfortable, using confident body language will give the impression that you are calm.
Step 2. Be receptive to people who are different from you
The university will be a stage in which you will meet people with different backgrounds and identities. Don't ignore someone just because they're different from you or your friends from high school. If you keep an open mind, you could find your new best friend.
Step 3. Find a friend who is more sociable than you
The university will have a wide variety of people. Some of them will be shy and others will be the life of the party. Obviously, you will have to achieve a balance in your friendships, but you will have to choose at least one (or even a few) with wonderful social skills, who is excited about meeting other people and who is always willing to have fun.
This will maximize the chances that you will meet as many people as possible and that you will find a few who become very important to you
Step 4. Stay true to your identity
You may have heard this advice countless times already, but it bears repeating. Everyone will be eager to make new friends quickly in college, so they might change their personalities just to fit in. However, if you do develop a friendship forcibly, this usually doesn't work very well. Be yourself to develop authentic and lasting bonds.
- Focus on your talents and strengths, rather than your weaknesses. It doesn't matter that you're not a genius at math if you're brilliant at other languages.
- Take some time to reflect on your values and passions. What do you consider most important? What do you want to achieve in life?
- Remember that you can always find people who share your interests, values, and passions. Keep looking for ways to find like-minded people.
Advice
Sometimes embarrassing situations can be great bonding opportunities
Warnings
- Don't expect to have a close-knit group of friends right away. It may take a while to find the right people, so you will need to be patient and have an open mind.
- Remember that you are in college to study. Find a balance between your social life and your academic life.