Maybe your in-laws are cool (lucky!) Or maybe you're a little scared of them. Either way, you can win their sympathy. Whether you meet them or are just getting to know them for the first time, impressing your in-laws can seem overwhelming. Your actions reflect the type of person you are, and will also establish the type of relationship you will have with them in the future. Above all, be courteous and do your best to show that you are interested in and respect them.
Method 1 of 2: Make a Good First Impression
Step 1. Dress well
Like it or not, the way you look is a big part of a first impression. Wear clothes that flatter you without making you look too warm. You don't want to be sweating when you meet your in-laws. Also, you don't want to wear a cocktail dress or a tuxedo when everyone else is wearing sundresses or T-shirts!
- Make sure your clothing items are clean, presentable, and not overly revealing or possibly offensive.
- For casual or semi-casual occasions, you can wear a nice shirt or tank top with khaki pants, or a dress that makes you look cool while making you feel comfortable and not flashy. In cooler weather, a good sweater may suffice. Jeans can also be a good option, as long as they are clean and tear-free.
Step 2. Bring them a small gift if you are going to their house
If your in-laws have invited you to their home, it is generally considered polite to bring them food, a drink, or a small gift. Ask your partner what they think is appropriate, and give the gift to your in-laws when you arrive.
- Things like chocolate bottles or some flowers can work wonders.
- Make sure to ask your partner about your in-laws' expectations first. In some cultures, it is considered offensive to wear something when you are a guest.
- Ask your partner if their parents like to drink alcohol before bringing wine or any other alcoholic beverage as a gift. If they do not drink or are against drinking alcohol, this will not be a good gift.
Step 3. Start conversations that show your interest
Work with your partner and do some research. Find out what your in-laws are interested in, and be sure to ask them questions about it. You can also ask them about their hobbies, home, or family history. Showing that you care about them will really pay off!
- If you have interests in common, bring them up to bond: “Mr. López, Samanta says he's interested in diving. I also!".
- Even small comments and questions like "Who is in this photo?" they will show your interest.
Step 4. Praise her appearance and her belongings
You can make comments like "They have a really nice house!" or “I love that sweater! Where do I buy it?". Compliments like these are another way to show your interest in them, that you want to be on good terms, and that you are a person whose company is pleasant.
Even if their style is different from yours, find something that you can praise. Try a phrase like: “That tapestry is really interesting. Where do I buy it?"
Step 5. Have a personal conversation
If you are at a large family reunion or other group event, try to find a time to speak personally with one or both of your in-laws. It doesn't have to be a big conversation, just find an opportunity to show them that you feel comfortable in their company. Thank them for inviting you, and tell them that you hope to spend more time with them.
- Try something like, “I just wanted to thank you for inviting me. I've had a really good time! Why don't we get together again next week? We can go to that new Vietnamese restaurant. "
- You can also have a little chat where you can talk about the weather or sports, ask about their weekend plans, or compliment them on their clothes.
- These little conversations are a great way to bond!
Step 6. Be especially polite if you are in public
Your in-laws will be paying attention to how you treat them, your partner, and actually everyone else, so be respectful and courteous! For example, if you are dining at a restaurant, now is not the time to criticize the food, be rude to the waiter, etc.
Step 7. Taste the food even if you don't think you will like it
If your in-laws have invited you over to their home for lunch, actually tasting their food will show that you respect and appreciate the invitation. Even if it's something you don't normally eat, try some. If you don't like it, just say thank you and say you're full!
- If you have religious, ethical, health, or other serious reasons for not eating something, just politely communicate it to them.
- Telling your in-laws that the food was delicious will also make a good impression.
Step 8. Let them know how good it was to meet them
Make sure to take a moment before you leave to tell them that you had a great time. Tell them that you had a lot of fun and that you hope to see them again soon.
Method 2 of 2: Develop a Stronger Relationship
Step 1. Respect your partner
In-laws will always want to make sure that you treat their daughter or son well. Be kind and loving to your partner, and show them that you have a good relationship.
Avoid fighting, annoying or insulting your partner when you are in the presence of your in-laws. If you have something to solve, save it for when you are alone
Step 2. Ask them for advice
Your in-laws will want to be valuable people in your life. One way to show them that they are important to both you and your partner is to ask for their opinions and advice. You can call them to get their opinion or ask for a time alone to speak in person when everyone is going out together as a family.
- You can try asking them for advice on important things, such as "Are you coming home to go hunting with us?"
- Asking for advice on everyday things will impress them as well (for example, you can ask, “What do you think I should wear for the holiday party?” Or “Do you know anything about the price change for oils?”).
Step 3. Talk to them often
Go out of the way to visit your in-laws. If you stop by their house just to see how they are doing, they will thank you and earn a lot of respect points.
- It's natural to get in touch with family during vacations and other events. Try calling or texting your in-laws every now and then for no reason. They will probably appreciate the gesture even more, as it was unexpected.
- For example, you can call your mother-in-law and say, “Hi! I was just calling to see how you are doing. It's been a hectic week for me, and I bet yours has been a long one too. "
Step 4. Prepare their favorite foods
Bring one of your in-laws' favorite dishes when you go to their house, or prepare one for them when they go to your house. They will be impressed that you took the time to find out what they like. Even if they say you haven't done very well, they will appreciate the gesture!
- If you're not sure what their favorite dishes are, ask your partner.
- During a conversation, casually ask them what they like to eat. For example, ask them "What kind of food do they enjoy?" or "What is your favorite dessert?"
Step 5. Give thoughtful gifts
Giving dates, such as holidays and birthdays, can be a great opportunity to show your in-laws that you care. Try to give them things that you know they will love. They will be impressed by your thoughtfulness.
For example, if you know your mother-in-law collects things with farm motifs, giving her a set of chicken and rooster salt and pepper shakers probably means more to her than a gift card
Step 6. Ask them to spend quality time together
Some families like to take vacations with their in-laws, and this can be a good bonding experience. However, quality time doesn't have to be a daunting task. Everyday things like going shopping with one of your in-laws or asking them to watch a game are really meaningful.