Obedience is a bit of a touchy subject, as it can easily become abusive. However, this is not to say that there is something wrong with cultivating obedience to your parents, to authority figures (for example, teachers or bosses), or even to your faith (if you have it). Do not forget that obedience must be given freely. In case the object of your obedience (for example, a parent) abuses it, you have every right to revoke it.
Steps
Method 1 of 3: Be Obedient to Your Parents
Step 1. Be respectful
Part of being obedient includes showing respect for your parents, honoring their ideas about what is best for you, and showing that you think they are worth listening to. Be careful to listen when they speak to you and respond when asked to do so.
- Avoid ignoring them in public. If you've dated your parents, you may feel like they're embarrassed a bit, but it's extremely rude for you to pretend that you don't know or aren't with them. Also, this could hurt them. They don't say that you embarrass them, so why would you think of them that way?
- Avoid rolling your eyes when asked to do something. In case you don't like what they ask of you, the polite way to respond is to ask if you can give them your opinion as to why you don't want to do what they want you to do. Consider all the times you asked your parents to do something for you as a child and they did it without complaint.
Step 2. Stay tuned to your chores
Parents usually don't ask you to do a lot of chores. In fact, they probably work much harder than you. Obedience involves doing what you see needs to be done without your parents even asking you to do it.
- Don't make your parents repeatedly ask you to do something. We all get distracted from time to time, so you may not always remember to do a chore without being asked, but you should try not to be regular.
- Do your best to help around the house without being specifically ordered. For example, you can offer to babysit your little sister so your parents can have a night off or find out when garbage day is and take it out before your mother has to.
Step 3. Consider why your parents say no, rather than arguing
Parents have all kinds of rules as to what they think you should and shouldn't do. While you may not always like or agree with them, an obedient child takes his parents' point of view into account rather than fighting about it.
- Avoid succumbing to the knee-jerk reaction to argue with them or express your disappointment or displeasure. If you really have to respond with a discussion, you should make it a debate and not a dispute. Instead of yelling or being insensitive, try writing or emailing them a letter or message explaining your point of view.
- In case they tell you that you can't go out with a friend on a Thursday night, they may worry that you won't finish your assignments on time or that you will be very tired at school the next day.
Step 4. Disagree politely
Sometimes your parents may ask you to do something unreasonable or impose irrational restrictions on you. Many times, you can go a long way to achieve what you want without being disobedient if you have a quiet discussion about why you think their demands are unreasonable or if you suggest alternatives or a concession.
- Calmly explain your side of the matter. Provide facts instead of relying on your feelings.
- Obedience does not imply that you don't have your own mind and it definitely does not imply that you should always agree with your parents. However, in case you do not agree and want to express it, you will need to do so politely, but firmly.
Step 5. Be courteous
Courtesy to your parents is a sign of respect and obedience. You should also be courteous to others: strangers, family members, your friends. This will allow you to show how well your parents raised you.
- Make sure you ask permission to get up from the table after dinner.
- Say "please" and "thank you" even for basic things.
- Keep the doors open for others and offer to help them with their purchases.
Step 6. Never rebel against your parents
While it is possible to disagree with them, if they give you a reasonable instruction and turn against them just to anger or annoy them, this, in addition to being immoral, is completely sinful. Consider the consequences before making a decision.
Method 2 of 3: Be Obedient to Authority Figures
Step 1. Pay attention to what they say
When trying to be obedient to an authority figure (for example, your teacher or your manager), you need to pay attention when they speak. You must show that you are interested.
- In class, you should look at the teacher when he speaks. Take notes when they provide important information and look interested.
- Be careful to listen to your boss when he gives you instructions. Again, eye contact is important.
Step 2. Talk about your concerns or problems in private
In case there is a problem with an authority figure, you should never bring it up in front of others but you should ask if you can talk to her either in her office or after class.
Step 3. Know how to obey authority
While you should always respect authority, you should never worship it. Respect for authority involves acknowledging the authority of a superior and obeying his reasonable rules. However, those who respect authority are seldom left in silence in the event that an authority figure treats them badly or unfairly. On the other hand, those who revere authority literally revere authority figures. They believe that because a superior has authority, everything he says must be true. Therefore, reverence for authority often involves suffering injustice, while respect for authority only gives you a reputation for being respectful, kind, and considerate, which is worth aspiring to.
For example, if you think that your teacher gave you the wrong grade for an assignment, you would go and discuss it with him after class. Give them some clear and concise reasons as to why you think you deserve another rating (no, "I worked really hard on this" is not a reason)
Step 4. Understand what is expected of you
It is not easy to be obedient to someone if you are not entirely sure what they want from you. This is part of paying attention to what your authority figure says, as this will help you know what they need from you. If you disagree with an authority figure, avoid being rude. Just talk about it politely, and you might get what you want in the long run.
- To be obedient to your teacher, you will need to keep up with things like homework, class work, important projects (if any), whatever is required in terms of class participation, etc.
- To be obedient to a superior at work, you will need to know what is expected of you in terms of your job. You will need to pay attention to long-term projects and be careful not to waste your time at work browsing the internet.
Step 5. Be careful to complete your tasks on time
After you know what is expected of you, it will be time for you to meet those expectations in a timely manner. In case you have legitimate reasons why a certain task or duty will not be completed on time, be careful to inform your authority figure.
Step 6. Don't retort insolently
Fighting or quarreling with your boss or teacher is the exact opposite of being obedient. Especially in a classroom or work situation, your opinion about the authority figure will not matter as much.
- Sassy retorts can also be non-verbal (for example, rolling your eyes or smiling when the person says something you don't agree with or that seems silly to you).
- In case he tells you to do something, avoid saying something like "This is completely unnecessary." If you have any questions or want to know why, ask in a respectful but assertive way.
Step 7. Act like you respect the person
Obedience and respect tend to go hand in hand. If you want to be obedient to someone, you need to behave as if you respect them as an authority figure. If he tells you to do something, you should do it (as long as it is reasonable, moral, and harmless).
Be courteous and considerate. Say "please" and "thank you." However, don't forget that you should never apologize or take responsibility for something if you haven't
Step 8. Never practice blind obedience
In case your authority figure tells you to jump off a cliff, would you do it obediently anyway? Obedience, like everything else, has limits. If you trespass on them, you will go from being disciplined to being reckless and foolish. Be careful obeying your authority figures, as while they may be authoritarian, few are completely virtuous.
Method 3 of 3: Be Obedient in a Religion
Step 1. Cultivate humility
Being obedient in following the commands of your faith also means being humble. You accept that your god helps guide your life and you accept not only the good but also the evil that comes.
Try not to take responsibility for the things that happen to you in life. If something good happens, you must remind yourself that it was by the grace of your Grand Master. In case something unhappy happens to you, it will be a learning experience also promoted by Him or Her
Step 2. Commit to your faith
Most religions have specific rules and regulations that a practitioner must follow. By committing to your faith, you must relinquish control over your life (not in a bad way) and understand that what happens comes from your Holy Master.
Step 3. Make decisions that are aligned with your faith
Again, as a result of the rules and regulations of the different religions, there will be certain decisions that will be difficult because they will force you to choose between a life that may be materially easier but not spiritually acceptable. Being obedient to your faith means choosing the latter.
- For example, such a decision could be the sacrifice of your career because it is not aligned with your beliefs.
- It could also be something like taking significant time throughout the day to incorporate prayer.
Step 4. Don't judge others based on their beliefs and obedience
Obedience to your faith is personal. It means you have a connection to your god and your faith, which can be wonderful.
This does not imply that you have carte blanche to criticize the beliefs of others or infringe on their way of life
Advice
- Obedience is something very personal, especially when it comes to obedience to your god. You should not make value judgments about the faith of others or their families, since you have no idea what their beliefs are or how they perceive obedience.
- In case you argue with your parents, you should remain calm. As the fight begins, you should immediately go to your room. Say no more than one sentence and DO NOT cry or beg. When an hour has passed, go back to your parents and observe them. In case they are calm, come over and tell them that you understand what you did wrong (if you did). Apologize in case you've done something wrong, and apologize to your parents for their anger. Ask them to speak to you calmly and tell them that it is easier for you to obey them when they speak eloquently.
Warnings
- If you feel that you are being abused or intimidated by an authority figure, ask for help immediately. This can be a problem that could result in physical violence.
- Polite protests are not insolent retorts. They won't be as long as you speak courteously and don't interrupt. In case a superior says that you are insolently retorting when you are not, just stop talking, make eye contact, smile and say "Please continue sir." You don't have to be sorry to do this, but it will stop the authority figure from berating you.
- Never forget that obedience is your right. You have the right to give it and retract it to each person. You should not feel like you will be punished for disobeying someone. If you feel this way, you may need to seek help, as this person may be trying to harass or intimidate you.
- You must be careful with obedience. This must be based on respect for the figure you are going to obey. In case this person abuses that respect, you should not feel an obligation to obey them.